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Someone getting in your way? Ever think it might be you?

Wednesday, 27 February 2013 | By Linnet Hunter

Every time I try to take a step forward my way seems to be blocked. There are things in the way holding me back.

 

Some of the blocks are petty and others are bigger: there’s a box full of filing that hasn’t been done and it’s sitting right in the doorway impeding access; clients say they want things asap and then don’t get back to me for a couple of weeks; the internet connection is wavering; BAS has to be paid this week; the Twitter account is about to die for lack of bird food and my clothes don’t fit.

 

Okay some of these are larger problems than others, like my wardrobe blues for instance, but you may notice they all have one common denominator – me.

 

Yes, folks, when you work for yourself by yourself, the buck stops here. That’s an American saying – I have no idea what a buck is or why it should stop anywhere, but anyway we all know it means – I’m responsible. I’m in charge.

 

But I don’t always feel like I am in. Sometimes I feel like someone else has put that box there, failed to file papers, ring the client back, complain about the internet connection, incurred the BAS and forgotten to tweet.

 

In fact, I wish someone else was responsible because then when I give them a good serve for being so slack I won’t have to look in the mirror.

 

When I start talking like this it’s a sure sign that what is needed is a Conversation for Appreciation. This also can be done with a mirror – although that’s a big ask on occasion.

 

It consists of reminding, reflecting and being responsible for the good stuff as well as the bad.

 

Looking at what I have learnt over the past few weeks. Remembering what amazing things my last coaching client achieved and said it was down to you (we know it wasn’t but I still feel the joy of a shared accomplishment).

 

How many of these blogs have I managed to write in the last six months in the midst of studying, working, caring for a partner and being a mother, stepmother and grandmother? Come on!

 

So there are a few bits of small stuff lying about and yes, you have a habit of putting things in your way – but that’s so you are taller when you climb over them!

 

Yes, we all need to be appreciated, thanked and acknowledged from time to time. Maybe your last boss wasn’t so good at that, but now you are it.

 

So raise that hand over your head, bend it at the elbow and give yourself a resounding pat on the back for having got this far in the way that you have.

 

You’re a solo operator? You’re a solo star!

 

And once you give yourself the time to recognise and appreciate that, you’ll have the strength to shift fifty boxes, and as many blocks, right out of your way.