{"id":45332,"date":"2023-10-20T15:42:43","date_gmt":"2023-10-20T15:42:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/startupsmart.test\/2023\/10\/20\/its-inevitable-that-the-internet-changes-how-we-relate-what-matters-is-how-startupsmart\/"},"modified":"2023-10-20T15:42:43","modified_gmt":"2023-10-20T15:42:43","slug":"its-inevitable-that-the-internet-changes-how-we-relate-what-matters-is-how-startupsmart","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.startupsmart.com.au\/uncategorized\/its-inevitable-that-the-internet-changes-how-we-relate-what-matters-is-how-startupsmart\/","title":{"rendered":"It’s inevitable that the internet changes how we relate \u2013 what matters is how – StartupSmart"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/em><\/span>Breaking up is never easy, and while 20 years ago there may well have been little or no post break-up contact between exes, 21st century technology \u2013 from social media to Whatsapp \u2013 means there are many new ways to open old wounds. With so many communications channels with which to get hold of people, and with so much of our lives visible online through such things as Facebook, it\u2019s easy to keep an eye on our exes once we\u2019ve parted.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n A recent study found that \u201cFacebook stalking\u201d an ex-partner was found to hinder recovery after the end of the relationship through prolonging the emotional distress felt. Those who were more traumatised by the break-up were more likely to indulge in Facebook stalking. It\u2019s hard to imagine that these people would all have been prepared to stalk their ex-partners so readily in real life. What is the internet doing to our relationships with other people that lead us to behave so differently on- and offline?<\/p>\n <\/p>\n The two key attributes the internet offers that allow people to act so differently online are anonymity and physical distance. These attributes contribute to the disinhibition effect. The internet essentially removes the constraints we usually feel when talking face-to-face, with the resulting effects on our behaviour, leading to online bullying, trolling, stalking and flaming. The regularity with which these behaviours appear in the media might lead us to think that the disinhibition effect has only negative effects, but there can be positive effects too.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Building closer relationship with people is built upon sharing things about ourselves, such as our likes, dislikes, worries and concerns. Some people find this quite challenging face-to-face, so the physical distance provided by communicating through the internet is invaluable. For example socially anxious adolescents find it easier to disclose personal information to their friends when online, the internet acting as a place where relational skills can be practised.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n A report from Pew Research in the US found that digital technology enhances teenagers\u2019 romantic relationships, helping them feel closer and more connected to their partner and to resolve conflict \u2013 although being able to access a partner\u2019s online profile can easily lead to jealousy, too. But generally, by connecting with others online we can keep in touch with family, friends and acquaintances, near or far, which helps us to strengthen social ties and become closer.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n As well as supporting friendships, the internet can provide opportunities for support at important times in our life \u2013 sometimes even from strangers. There are many online support groups, from the general to the very specific. Social media is often used as support following specific events \u2013 for example, a Facebook group has been set up for survivors of the Aurora Theater Shooting in Colorado in 2012. These groups can help people develop a sense of empowerment, allowing them to feel more in control with greater self confidence. Being able to talk to strangers who have experienced or are experiencing similar circumstances can have a cathartic effect.<\/p>\n <\/p>\nFor good and for ill<\/h2>\n